I have a pretty good number of followers who are subscribers to my blog and receive updates on new postings through email.  I also have generated more traffic to my site by linking many of my posts to my facebook and twitter accounts.  Surprisingly to me, this got more people reading my posts but still produced very few comments.

What did begin happening however is people gave me feedback in different ways.  Since I know about half my readers personally, it was not uncommon to be at work or church and have someone come up to me and tell me they read my blog and give me some feedback.  Some people emailed me their comments about what they read on my site.  Others gave comments via twitter or text.  And some people would click on the link I posted on facebook, go to my site, read my post, go back to facebook, and type in their thoughts there.  Again, this frustrated me.  I would think, why don’t they just leave their comments on my site?

I had to realize that for whatever reason, most of my readers just did not (or do not) want to leave public comments attached to the posts they read.  This did not mean that they were not giving me feedback though.  And that’s what I ultimately wanted.  It would not be wise of me to condemn others when they email me or give me their input in person.  Yelling “put it on the blog” would probably not get me the response I want.  Among the unique people who read what I write there is a trend of giving feedback in a more private and sometimes more personal way.  It would be counterproductive for me to fight this and try to force on them the model I want.

Rather I am embracing this trend.  I now send every new post out on twitter and link most of them to facebook.  I try to encourage conversation when people tell me they read my post.  If I’m getting what it is I want (feedback) it doesn’t really matter how I’m getting it.  I can’t be so concerned about which method or form I think is “right,” it’s more important to know what works!

In your work or relationships are there any new trends you are still trying to put into old molds?  Do you need to forsake what you think is right for the enhancement of what works?  Be on the lookout for how people and processes change and embrace them.  Fighting to keep things the same does not provide greater outcomes.

If you know me well you know I’m a list-maker and planner.  So that’s what I did.  I came up with a three step plan for building confidence in myself.  I focused on building confidence throughout my days.  I talked to other people about building confidence.  I read things I thought would give me confidence.  As someone who wants to plant a good church and lead a large group of people, I saw extreme confidence as a must.

However, I was at our church’s prayer and worship service one night when I felt God correct me on this.  I was moved as I watched one of our worship leaders lead in music.  It wasn’t confidence she was showing, it was something else.  I then saw one of the pastors lead a powerful time of prayer.  He didn’t do it with confidence though, he lead with something else.

In praying through this later that night I felt as though God reveled to me that what I need, and what I saw from those leading at church, is not confidence, but authority.  Specifically, Godly authority.  I spent some time journaling and thinking through this idea.  Confidence is a tricky thing.  You can gain confidence to lead and then use that confidence to lead in a wrong direction.  But Godly authority comes from hearing God and being obedient to do what He says.

When God speaks, when He leads, when He places something on our heart to do, then we can carry that out knowing we are doing what God has told us and that His approval is on us.  He places His authority on us to carry out the tasks He has called us to.  We can lead with Godly authority, knowing we are walking in obedience.

Godly authority trumps human confidence.  And this authority comes from carrying out God’s will.  This act of obedience is the ultimate form of worship, creating a healthy cycle of pleasing God and by pleasing Him, knowing you have His authority to do His work.

“Leaders absorb pain.”

“You will never have to forgive another person of as much as Christ forgave you.”

Like with anything, there are some basic principles and guides you should follow.  I mean the legal, set up process will look about the same for every church (that is, if you want to be legal).  But other than that, there are as many different philosophies on church planting as there are church planters.

I think part of the reason I spent so long doing nothing was because I was waiting on the proper method or trying to find the correct way.  Such a thing does not exist and as long I was looking for it I was not going to be able to do anything else.  I was looking for permission to get started from a book or a seminar.

In observing that one church can start in Los Angeles, California doing one thing and another church can start in Dalton, Georgia doing something different (and they both work), I realized there is not a combination.

What’s important is that I be faithful to who God called me to be and what He called me to do.  If I’m living in the middle of those two truths there is actually a lot of freedom in the specifics of what and how.

So now I learn from others for encouragement and for ideas I can tweak to perhaps utilize in our setting.  I’m no longer looking for someone else who has had success to dictate how we are going to do church.  What works for them may not (and probably will not) work for us.  There’s no one way to do it.  So I’m just gonna be me.

I used to look at websites of churches in Chattanooga looking for something wrong with them. Glad I’m not that insecure anymore.

Lead with your cause, not your personality, character, or talent.

People will follow someone who makes them feel important.

I don’t need to prove myself talented as much as I need to prove myself burdened, willing and trustworthy.

Don’t surprise your employees by changing their schedule and not letting them know.

Being scared about the potential of something bad is not near as real or deep as being scared about the potential of something good.

Any topic becomes more interesting when the speaker is passionate and prepared.

When the local vision is being accomplished, raise the bar with a clear global vision.

I don’t mind working hard, or even working a lot, but I HAVE to know what it is I’m supposed to do!!! Frustration is worse than exhaustion!

I tend to think clearer when I’m outside.

We can read and study and learn all day but the only way we can improve our daily lives is through changing our habits.

In my moments of weak faith I am tempted to plan, assuming one more list in a file will put me in control.

I’m willing to be hurt deeply to be used greatly.

You have to be someone people want to hear from before your opinion will be taken seriously by others.

The only time you ever need to respond is when something has changed or you have been proven to be wrong.

I end way too many sentences with “so..” and “or whatever.” This shows uncertainty and lack of confidence.

Sometimes we learn more from questions than answers.

What a great reminder as an eight year old boy this song was that I am royally screwed up.  I mean, God created all of Heaven and Earth in just a week, but as long as I live He will have to keep working on me and apparently never get it right.

To be honest though, I know this is true.  I understand I’m not perfect and never will be.  Since college though I have learned to grow or “feed” myself with knowledge and have created a strong desire to always do so.

God will never be done with me and I want to always be available to be stretched, strengthened, and grown by him so that I may be used by him.  I am constantly trying to challenge my own ideas as well as those accepted by others.  I took full advantage of the conferences, books, and everyday conversations available in my life.  Whenever I hear or read anything that sticks out that I may want to come back to later I write it down and file it.  (For real, I have a filing system so massive and extensive you would call me a nerd if you only knew.)

Though I hope to always be learning, at some point I hope to stop only absorbing resources and actually become a resource for others.  If I’m going to expect to have anyone listen or care about what I have to say I must make sure I have learned things worth repeating.  I must lead the way in personal growth so I can challenge those around me to do the same.

No matter where life takes me I want to always show myself as a real person with wants, needs, weaknesses, and temptations.  I don’t ever want to be someone that people who used to know me talk about and say things like, “_____ sure changed him.”  The blank could be anything.  Money.  Recognition.  Leadership.  What ever else people say bring out the dark side of others.

I’m not called to be private, unapproachable, off limits, elite, better, judgmental, or arrogant.  I’m called to be Aaron.

When I was younger I would go through things that were quite painful at the time – A high school break up, a disappointing sports performance, receiving ridicule from other teens, etc.  In those times I felt like the adults in my life would blow those problems off as minor though they were so real to me.  I remember determining in my heart that I would never forget what it felt like to be a teen.  I wanted to make sure I always understood that pain.

That is what I mean when I say I want to “be real.”  I want to remember the things that hurt, confuse, frustrate, and excite me at this stage in my life.  I don’t ever want to grow out of or beyond that to where I ignore the others who will still be in those places.

My calling is to serve God by serving people.  That’s what I plan to do.

When writing out my list of core values, next to the word integrity I wrote down:

To be respected and trusted I must live honestly and boldly, doing what is right in my personal and business dealings with others.

In my mind, that is what personal integrity is for me.  At the end of each day the only thing that is going to give me peace of mind is knowing that I have been obedient to God, faithful to my family, and honest to and about myself.  If those things ever come to a place of disagreement then we have an issue.

Being who I am and being that all the time.  That’s integrity.  It will not automatically bring a successful business and happy family, but not having it will certainly prevent those things.

Lying, cheating, cutting corners, appeasing others, and constantly being on the look out for something more appealing is a slippery slope to nowhere good.  The best way to prevent it is to never start.  The best way to never start is to be intentional and determined before had.  That’s what I’m doing.  It’s integrity, and it’s that important!

I have decided that I must look past what people look like or have done to see who they really are and show Christ-like acceptance to ALL people.

People will follow someone who makes them feel important.  And I want to be someone people love to follow.  I consider it my life calling to see and help develop life change in other people.  I want to be someone who adds and builds into other people’s lives and point them to hope.  For many, the first step in believing and seeing life change is to feel acceptance.  I want to be marked as someone who helps others feel accepted as I demonstrate the love God has given to all of us.

Our church plant also has a core value similar to this though in that case I listed it as integrity because it includes the business operations of the church as well as the ministry functions and standards.  That’s how important I think this is – I want purity to be ingrained into the everyday functions of my church and myself!

As someone who has failed in the past in guarding my reputation and resisting temptation I realize the power and sobriety of the issue.  By whatever means necessary I must live a life above reproach.  I set this up as my first and perhaps most important personal core value in order to guard my intimacy with God and my family as well as avoid distractions in my marriage and ministry.

No matter what mine or your other personal values are, if in some way we are not being intentional about guarding our hearts, minds, and action we could easy allow for things to slip into our lives that will cause a crashing down of all the valuable things we have built into.  I’m glad that this early in my life and ministry I have realized that I must lead with purity!