Funny Twitter Messages – Part 3
Posted By Aaron Marcelli on April 7, 2011
You know you spend too much time on twitter when you include a hash tag in a text message to your wife.
Someone just turned the lights out on me in the bathroom.
some people need to use blogs and twitter to give bad reviews about my book and call it heresy and evil. That always makes books sales go up
Had guy standing hastily outside theatre @ church protesting the music. wasnt effective-everyone he wanted to notice was inside worshiping.
Amazed at the number of grandmas in victorias secret
Just met a girl who said she is working on her masters degree. im kind of disappointed that someone ever gave her a high school diploma.
Im so used to talking to my wife on the phone i have to stop myself from saying “love you, bye” before hanging up with everyone else.
I was a street preacher for fifteen minutes once.
Car cd player still broke. Had to listen to all the morning shows of people who think they are funny.
If chocolate were alcohol, my wife would be the town drunk
You know you are old when your wife asks if you wanna go upstairs and have sex and you tell her you cant do both. -tony campolo
There is a women at church who has a cross tattoo in her cleavage. now thats making the gospel attractive! #conversationstarter
I had fruit and milk with lunch. Well……….cobbler and ice cream.
Just took two different “what character on family guy are you” tests and both said I was Lois. Not sure how to feel about that.
If you own a snuggie please let me know – i need to unfollow you.
Indecisive people should not be allowed to be in front of others in lines.
at Sam’s club..buying a 42 pack of toothbrushes
We taught our 13 month old niece lust tonight… We took her to toys r us. now at p f changs… good stuff!
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